Tips for facing your 30 year high school reunion:
1. Be Yourself – Be your best self by booking those botox, teeth whitening, liposuction & manscaping appointments early. Laser hair removal is your new best friend.
2. Be happy with your career choices – When someone asks you what you do, don’t say boring accountant. You are working on an erotic novel entitled 50 Shades of a Balance Sheet. Stuck in sales or behind a desk? Casually mention you’re the true genius behind @GSElevator on Twitter.
3. Talk about your kids – Repeat after me: My kids are perfect. My kids are perfect. My kids are perfect.
4. Newly divorced? Unemployed? Bald? – There’s always pre-gaming. You never looked as good as you do through your own beer goggles.
Where did the time go?