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Tips for facing your 30 year high school reunion:

1. Be Yourself – Be your best self by booking those botox, teeth whitening, liposuction & manscaping appointments early.  Laser hair removal is your new best friend.

2. Be happy with your career choices – When someone asks you what you do, don’t say boring accountant.  You are working on an erotic novel entitled 50 Shades of a Balance Sheet.  Stuck in sales or behind a desk? Casually mention you’re the true genius behind @GSElevator on Twitter.

3. Talk about your kids – Repeat after me:  My kids are perfect.  My kids are perfect.  My kids are perfect.

4. Newly divorced?  Unemployed?  Bald? – There’s always pre-gaming.  You never looked as good as you do through your own beer goggles.

Where did the time go?